Bunny Butt Cookies II - Adventures to Walmart and Beyond
by candycanelila
Summary: "How is it this easy to lose a six foot, master of tai chi, gigantic kangaroo?" "He eez a rabbit, Jack," - After luring Bunny away from his job, Jack has to rally with North to stop Bunny's new obsession and save Easter! Sequel to Bunny Butt Cookies
"North!" Jack spiraled into the North Pole, knocking an elf off a ledge. "North!" he darted around a corner and ran headfirst into Phil's fluffy form.

"Phil!" Jack pushed his face out of the Yeti's chest. "Phil, I _need_ to find North! I ruined Easter!"

Phil raised an eyebrow and grumbled a sassy remark in Yetish, pointing behind him. Jack nodded in thanks and barreled past him.

"North! North!" Jack called out, peeking in every closet and room, looking over every Yeti and under every table. "North!"

"Jack? Vhat eez—" Jack turned a corner and smashed into North, knocking both of them to the floor. "…wrong."

Jack sprang to his feet and dragged North up. "North, you have to help me, I ruined Easter!"

North frowned. "But Easter eez tomorrow, how you ruin eet in von day?"

Jack sighed. "Pitch did it last year."

North nodded. "Da, da."

"But I distracted Bunny and now he's not finishing Easter, I don't know what to do!" Jack cried desperately.

North frowned. "Vait, you did vhat?"

Jack groaned. "Bunny is at Walmart eating cookies instead of making eggs for Easter!"

North's eyes widened. "Vait… Eez this about those cookies you got for him as a joke?"

Jack winced. "Uh, maybe?" North moaned and rubbing his hand down his face. "Ugh, can you help me!?"

North squinted. "Uh, vell, ve are preparing for Christmas—"

"You have nine months!"

North sighed. "Fine…"

* * *

"What about the kids? They're gonna see you, you know," Jack mumbled as they entered the building.

"Da," North turned around. "That eez why I have…" he grabbed a giant trench coat out of a pocket and slung it over his form. "Theez!"

Jack's eye twitched then he face palmed. "Let's just find Bunny…"

As they scanned the aisle methodically, a Jack spotted a little girl tugging on her mother's hand.

"Mommy, that fat old man is scaring me," she whined.

Her mother looked up. "Wait, who?" she frowned. "Wait, sweetie, that's rude."

Jack snickered and moved on, checking the instant bake isle. "Wait, North, the cookies are here!" he ran down the aisle.

North hurried after him. "Vait… I thought you vere getting him the egg cookies, vhat eez these!?"

Jack winced. "…Bunny… Butt Cookies…" he rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. "I was just trying to be a good friend!"

"By giving him cookies that look like his butt?!"

Jack shrugged. "It was better in theory…"

North sighed. "Vell, vere eez he now?"

Jack shrugged. "Self-check-out?"

* * *

"How is it this easy to lose a six foot, master of tai chi, gigantic kangaroo?"

"He eez a rabbit, Jack," North corrected.

Jack rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah, but where is he?"

They both looked around, scanning the area for the blue Pooka.

Jack frowned as he turned back to North. "…Wouldn't it have been convenient if he had jumped over right as I asked?"

North chuckled. "Da, da, that vould have been—"

There was a crash behind them and they turned around, spotting a rolling ball of grey-blue fur.

Jack shrugged. "That works too!" the two Guardians ran towards Bunny.

As they came closer, they could hear sounds of Bunny giggling weirdly and crunching on more cookies. Jack reached him first and rolled him over on his back.

"…Bunny?" Jack grimaced. "I didn't think a box of cookies shaped like bunny's butts could do this…"

"…To a bunny no less…" North nodded. "…Vhat now?"

Jack huffed. "I don't know, that's why I got you!"

Bunny hiccupped as he dumped the last cookie of the box he gripped in his paws into his mouth. He chewed and burped, giggled again.

Jack took the opportunity. "Hurry, he's out of cookies!" North nodded and lunged forward, sitting on the Pooka.

Jack made a face as Bunny groaned in pain. "Well, that's one way to do it," he knelt down beside Bunny. "Bunny. I know the cookies taste good."

"So _goooooooood_ …"

Jack sighed. "And I know that you really don't want to stop eating them."

" _Nooooooooooooooo…_ "

"But if you don't the kids will be so sad!" Jack emphasized.

"But _cookieeeeeeeees…_ "

"And, you'll turn into a tiny helpless baby rabbit again."

Bunny stopped struggling. "…Are you sure of that?"

Jack nodded matter-of-factly. "Yup. That's what happened last time, right?"

Bunny frowned, weighing his options. A few small children gawked at the scary, fat detective sitting on top of a big teddy bear.

Jack smirked. "And I'll get you more cookies when Easter is over?" he offered.

"…Ah suppose…"

Jack sighed in relief. "Oh, thank goodness…" he waved North with his hand. "Now let's hurry and get to the Warren before Easter starts!"

* * *

 **AN: SO, Happy Easter!**

 **I'm glad this happened…**

 **I just wanted to do at least one thing on this site for Easter!**

 **In case you didn't know, I'm still active, but mostly on Google Plus and Youtube, so if you still like me, then check me out there instead!**

 **Please review if you liked it and that's all for now (and probs the next few months)**

 **And to the guest review (not deleting it bcz i wanted to make a comment on it) some of my stories in the past have been interactive, but this one is absolutely not. I understand the fake CU people trying to get me back into the drama, but really, I'm good :)**

 **ttyl ;- ]**


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